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Friday, 02 October 2009

  • I dun want to be a troublemaker
    and I believe/hope I am not one
    So, I will keep my mouth shut
    but that doesn't mean the whole thing is OK
    Stop it before everyone is annoyed by that
    That's FAR MORE THAN ENOUGH !

Friday, 25 September 2009

  • well, today's 24th of Sept
    24 days after school has reopened
    still, i haven't adapted to school life and got myself into study mode
    it's ridiculous
    a f.7 student finds it difficult to adapt to school life
    that's me, ridiculous me  
    i feel like my world is turning upside down
    everything, everybody has gone crazy
    changes changes changes keep coming
    changing people, changing timetables, changing pressures, changing minds, changing relationships.....
    so many of them that i couldn't digest and simply dun wanna digest 
    i couldn't help quoting philip's golden saying "life is difficult"
    what the hell is going on and what the hell am i writing
    that's crazyyyyy

    philip had been wearing ridiculously ugly (or you can say uglily ridiculous) ties to school in these days
    the extent of ugliness and ridiculousness was that you couldn't stop laughing when you saw the ties
    and you couldn't understand why anyone on earth would wear such ties
    today, he finally got a more normal tie (more normal doesn't mean it is normal)  
    and he suddenly started cutting blinds in the middle of the lesson 
    and cut till the bell had gone 
    philip was born to be a technician, instead of an educator or a scientist as he always claims himself   
    because i love him cutting blinds more than teaching

    sb i don't know told me she wanna "kou" sb whom i dun really know
    the whole was like
    a f.2 dgs girl added me on fb days ago
    and asked if i knew a f.4 qc boy, whom is shown as a friend of mine on fb 
    i practically forget when i knew that guy and who he is 
    so, i just told the girl we had met in service
    the girl went on asking if i thought that guy was handsome
    and told me she wanted to "kou" him 
    and asked me to help her
    .........................................................
    why am i involved ?
    what do i have to do with this ??
    have i gone crazy ???
    or this world gone crazy ????
    why do i always encounter ridiculous things like this ?????

    ok, enough crazy things
    i just hope this entry will mark the end of my insane life
    goodbye crazy and welcome normal

Thursday, 16 July 2009

  • 即使到現在還未敢相信她們已離開

     

    是我拒絕去想，拒絕去接受這個事實

     

    所以即使已過了好幾年，仍常常覺得她們存在身邊

     

    但其實她們已離我很遠很遠......

     

    這種感覺令人戰慄

     

    你以為還在身邊，但原來已再捉摸不到

     

    永遠再見不到一個人是很可怕的事

     

    我怕死亡

     

    因為它令我什麼都捉不緊，什麼都捉不住

     

    唯有緊緊捉住自己這一刻的生命

     

    不讓離開的人擔憂和傷心

     

    努. 力. 活. 下. 去.

Tuesday, 09 June 2009

  • 那樣真心  與你聊不完的曾經   
    我已經分不清  你是友情還是錯過的愛情

Friday, 05 June 2009

  • When you told me there's no need for me to know and that you would feel disgusted towards that person
    you stabbed me like a cold knife and pushed me away not only from this, but also from you
    That's horrible because you were so cold and unfamiliar to me
    Up till this moment, I insist I was not wrong
    I was trying to help you to take one pace forward
    I couldn't deny you don't think in the same way though
    Maybe I am too self-centred to think of only what I THINK
    Maybe I am too arrogant to think that I am ABLE and SHOULD help you
    Maybe you don't appreciate
    But you didn't need to use such harmful words
    Once the words were out, they could never be taken back
    I couldn't help thinking if I have become one of your betrayers
    There is enough to bother, I don't want to struggle on this anymore
    Thanks for reminding me that I shouldn't have got so much involved
    and HATE me if you think I am wrong
    I am too naive and silly to learn from mistakes

     

Saturday, 02 May 2009

  • 這一陣子對人際關係感到很迷惘
    聽得太多，看得太多
    很多人不是我看到的一樣，也不是我想像中的一樣
    當要揭開他們的面具時，我突然感到懦弱
    我不敢上前去看清真正的他們
    我寧願看到的，永遠只是他們的面具
    我什麼都不知道，我什麼也不敢想
    為什麼退縮的要是我? 難道知道真相是我的錯嗎?
    面對某些關係，我實在不懂怎去處理

    只知道最近耳邊常響起「放手 至可擁有」

    是在暗示我應放手嗎

    不是不想放，只是心有不甘

    或許我應效法莊子，凡事都不要那麼執著
    又或者是時候學習怎樣做一個八面玲瓏的人
    無論如何，Katie你的話讓我想了很多，謝謝你的分享和信任

Saturday, 28 February 2009

  • I have been living in frustrations recently, I don’t know what I am doing, nor do I know what I am thinking. I try to convince myself that nothing has happened, but every time it ends up with tears running down. I don’t think I am really alright and I don’t think I can really wipe that off my mind. People around me make me sick, they are fucking me up and destroying my life. Ironically, they make me feel like they have done nothing wrong. They pretend there’s nothing wrong, but there’s indeed something. There’s something that has changed our relations, that has turned them into strangers to me.

     

    I feel very uneasy when we are together because I no longer know who you are. I have given you many chances; yet, you turn me down and that hurts. Sometimes, I want to hate you, I want to ignore you, but in the end, I fail to do so because I don’t feel like I want to give you up. I don’t think we should break up because of this, which doesn’t worth our friendship at all. Maybe you think in a different way, and maybe that’s my mistake to think too much and care too much. I shouldn’t have got so involved, that’s your life and it has nothing to do with me. Yet, it’s horrible to think so because when I do, I will lose this friend.

     

    J, sorry for being rude to you. I have many to say, but I am not in a mood to tell you. Sometimes, I choose to hide myself from you because I don’t know how to face you. You have always been so caring to me, but I am such a horrible friend. I am afraid I will do something wrong or say something wrong that would hurt you. I have read your private posts, I should have been there to support you. I am very sorry, I think we need a talk, but not in the classroom please.

Wednesday, 22 October 2008

  • After almost two months of Form 6 life ......................

    Three things that I most "hing hang" not being/doing :

    1) English Prefect

    2) Chief Editor

    3) Taking Economics/ Biology

    Three things that I most "hing hang" being/doing/having :

    1) Carmen as my neighbour

    2) Taking Pure Math

    3) Being the Chairlady of Zonta Z Club

    The only thing that I regret doing :

    TAKING AL PHYSICS